Friday, May 14, 2004
Inter Religious Forum (IRF): Cohabitation & Premarital Sex - Is Religion Outdated?

It was a very good event organised by the IMU and I have no regrets attending it last night. Somehow, I strongly agree with Prof Ong Kok Hai that another panelist (someone neutral; from the NGO perhaps) should also be invited to this forum. The panelists were Mr Bruno Pereira, Dr Harlina Halizah and Mr. Vijaya Samarawickrama. They were really good at conveying their points. Rationalism was there and they were far from those 'thy greater than thou fanatics' (read: people who try to show off their higher degree of religiosity). Anyhow, it was an interesting topic but 90 minutes was too short per se.

Cohabitation
The practice of where two people, male and female live together by sharing a household as male-female couple without being legally married
Premarital Sex

Voluntary sexual intercourse between individuals who are NOT legally married to each other

After attending this forum, I was made to realise again that religion did not exist to forbid us from everything. I was benefited in many ways from the three panelists especially Mr Vijaya. Premarital sex is not wrong per se if it's not all about lust and pleasure. It is not wrong too if a couple can bear the consequences of cohabitation or PMS, if such complications ever arise. However, it is wrong if someone feels used, abused, or hurt from it. It's all about commitment and responsibility. Raging hormones are not accepted in this case. He talked about The Five Precepts - No killing, no stealing, no sexual misconduct, no lying, no taking intoxicants. I really want to hear more from this guy. Every religion teaches its followers to be good.

I agree with Dr Harlinda as well that men and women are made to be totally different (If I am not mistaken, she cited this from the Quran). The differences are meant to compliment each other. I like the way how she portrayed the beauty of love making between married couples despite not being able to describe it. It sounded so much better. Better than thousand times of breathless fucks per se. She said that marriage is a gamble. A gamble which we can win. Being a pessimist in this aspect, I don't think I would buy that. It takes two hands to clap. No. Don't get me wrong. I believe in the holiness of matrimony. I see all beauty in a monogamous relationship/marriage. But what can you do if your partner has a change of heart? You can't do anything. Anyway, I am glad that she is happily married with four children. Not everyone is so lucky.

Thanks to Mr Bruno for reminding us the co-relation between religion and self-mastery/self-control. The only difference between us and animals is self-control. We do have our freedom until we choose to abuse it and become slaves to it. It's so true. Instand noodle. Instant coffee. Instant hair cut. Instant lust. Instant pleasure. Instant sex. Celibacy anyone? Ha-ha-ha. I am always at dilemma - not knowing which to listen to; my head or my feelings or my emotions. THE INTEGRATION! Yes. I am bad at integrating anything. Mr Bruno was right. We need to integrate all our thoughts, rationalism and emotions. I like how he treats religion. Something which needs self-discipline and self-control.

Thanks to 'Zee' from Sem 4 for hilighting some provocative issue on married couple's frustrated sex life or partners who can't perform during the Q and A. Win-win situation of having premarital sex or multiple sex partners. OH MI GAWD. Anyone supports one night stand here? NO. Not me. I can't go to bed/intimate with someone with no emotional attachment but just for the sake of happily being fucked. I don't mean to be bad. I don't even want to judge. But he sounded like a selfish arrogant @#&(!@(#&!@#!@#!@# who cares nothing more than his sexual gratification. Poor females. A female is just a female afterall. Whatever she does is usually govern by love and emotions most of the time. Something the opposite sex does not see/value.

*sigh* Life goes on!

n-g || 7:19 pm || ||
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