Wednesday, May 12, 2004
Depression

I spent almost half of my life suffering from depression. Managed to pick up some left over notes from the previous lecture when I took my seat.

Major Depression
Feeling of intense sadness and despair - YES
1. Mental slowing -> YES
2. Loss of concentration -> YES
3. Pessimistic -> YES
4. Worry -> YES
5. Lack of pleasure -> YES
6. Self-depreciation -> YES
7. Variable agitation -> YES
8. Insomnia -> AT TIMES
9. Hypersomia -> YES YES YES
10.Altered eating pattern (i.e Overeating) -> YES
11.As a consequent of factor 10, weight gain -> YES
12.(-) energy (No wonder factor 9 occurs) -> YES
13.Disruption of normal circadium rhythm, body temperature, many endocrine functions -> PERHAPS
14.Risk of suicide -> NOT SO SOON - HAHA

So I need anti depressants. Prozac with fluoxetine perhaps. Never did know that it was a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor. Serotonin sounds familiar. I've read/heard it somewhere before. Must be due to factor 1 above. Sigh! :(

It's difficult for me to cope but somehow my fighting spirit has to take over. I have to admit that I really hate how the way things ended for us. I hate to be the person who pisses him off but I did. I won't curse him or anything. It's just too bad for me. I am in no position to even demand for any explanation. Nevertheless, I wish him well and happiness always. (Not like he needs it but I am sincere. Things would be much better this way). Everything happens for a reason right? *smiles*
n-g || 11:06 pm || ||
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